outside

i am on the outside,
i am looking in,
i can see through you,
see your true colors,
coz inside you're ugly,
ugly like me,
i can see through you,
see the real you.

----powerplay---
pacific rim - ramin djawadi

the team went for a shoot in the grasslands. the main objective of the documentary being wolves. the final edited video showcased wolves in packs. what went unnoticed was the lone wolf. surrounded by the pack during hunts, company was easy to come by. otherwise the wolf walked alone. it lacked the courage to move with someone. to care for someone. when company did come by, the wolf's life revolved around it. it was a emotion that it craved. which was precious. scared to lose it. while other wolves moved around with someone, the ease of it was alien to the wolf.  it coudnt be with someone coz the feeling scared him, the feeling of hurting or being hurt. selfish and not selfish at the same time. it had no courage to admit its own loneliness. had no courage to be with someone. the more you want something, the harder you fall. its something that the wolf had learnt. it would have laid the world at someones feet. but what if it was kicked away. being perenially devoid of someone , it was habitually jealous. the lone wolf never gathers attention. the name attracts loneliness. and it only grows.